Random Joke Friday

Good Morning my peoples,


How are you all doing on this Friday? I know, it’s cold but other than that. Me, I’m breathing.

Anyway, I received this in an email and thought I’d share. It’s just random questions that someone came up with.


  • If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?


  •  Can you cry under water?


  • How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?


  • Why do you have to ‘put your two cents in’… but it’s only a ‘penny for your thoughts’? Where’s that extra penny going to?


  • Once you’re in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?


  • Why does a round pizza come in a square box?


  • What disease did cured ham actually have?


  • How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?


  • Why is it that people say they ‘slept like a baby’ when babies wake up like every two hours?


  • If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?


  • Why are you IN a movie, but you’re ON TV?


  • Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?


  • Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They’re going to see you naked anyway.


  • Why is ‘bra’ singular and ‘panties’ plural?


  • Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?


  • If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?


  • Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?


  • If the professor on Gilligan’s Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can’t he fix a hole in a boat?


  • Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?

              They’re both dogs!


  • If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn’t he just buy dinner?


  • If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?


  • If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?


  • Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?


  • Why did you just try singing the two songs above?


  • Why do they call it an asteroid when it’s outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoids when it’s in your butt?


  • Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog’s face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

About datchickneeks

I'm a Virgo, I love most things entertainment related. Love PHOTOGRAPHY, and Fashion.

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