Gone

*sigh*

Why does it take walking away from someone for them to  realize that you’re serious with your words? Is it because so many people don’t say what they mean and mean what they say? I’ve always been the type of person to tell you where we stand, whether it be friendship or relationship so why do people take it as the shock of the century when I come through with my word.

For those of you that have taken the time to read my blog before, you’ll see I’ve written about this before and *yawns* I’m so over it.  Back and forth, round and round we go on this never-ending merry-go-round. Truthfully, I’ve hopped off the ride and already tumbled over from motion sickness. My spirit felt weak, my soul stripped. You can’t make anyone love you, nor can you make anyone treat you the way you’re deserved to be treated. With that being said, I resolved to never get on that ride again because the cost was too high and the line was too long. Thank God for that because my mind feels free *cue the Destiny’s Child song*.  When people realize that you stopped checking in and stopped putting forth the effort that you used to give, then suddenly the red flag goes up and they think “what the hell is going on here?”. Unfortunately for them, at that point it’s too late. Damage done, life mash up. With all that being said, does it hurt when the person that made you feel this way realizes the aforementioned? I guess so… makes me wonder though, did you feel hurt when you treated me like I wasn’t deserving of your respect? No? Did you feel hurt when I spent nights upset because you weren’t who you said you were? Oh, didn’t think so.

Take that hurt and put it somewhere, preferably somewhere far from me because I don’t care.

The Pursuit of ‘Happy’ness

Hello Lovers (and the rest of y’all)

Before you try to clock my tea right now, yes I know I’ve written about happiness before but I’m going to do it again if that’s okay. You like that eh? How I asked you like if I would have stopped if someone said no lol.

The Pursuit of Happiness.

Your pursuit on the road to happiness will definitely not be the same as mine or anyone elses. With that being said, why do we invest so much in “checking” with others if it’s okay to be happy within ourselves? Everything we do seems as though we have to okay it with everyone in our lives. The thought of running it by a friend to run it on the “Crazy” or “Sane” scale is cool, however every decision you make does not to be okayed by everyone in your circle. Too often do I see people who are unhappy in their relationship, career, life in general and are afraid to fix it because they care about what others will say. Here is the thing, people will ALWAYS talk and have something to say about whatever it is you do that’s just life. There is a reason why things like TMZ, ET, Inside edition, Access Hollywood, etc etc etc exist. Gossip magazines make money from publishing pictures of Britney Spears eating spaghetti on a damn patio for goodness sakes. Typically one of the tougher decisions that you make in your life, most people will try to persuade you not to do it just because it’s such a big choice. Last time I checked, they’re not living it. If you’re cool on mediocrity that’s on you. There is no way that someone could tell me to stay in a relationship that I’ve been in long-term just because folks will have some mess to say. Girl, bye! If someone had told me to stay with my ex of 3 years that cheated just because I’d laugh at them and call them an idiot. Wait, not “if” that did happen. To make a tough decision in the face of adversity shows a lot about your character. The thought of being unhappy everyday in a loveless relationship just doesn’t make any kind of sense to me. That math was clearly done by Fantasia (shade). Granted no one wants to hurt someone on purpose (well some wretched people do) but for the most part you faking a relationship is just hurting all parties involved. Sometimes no matter how much superglue you put it still falls apart the second you walk out of your house. You’re putting on a song and a dance for people who deep down don’t care about you. The things I hear from some of you is downright foolishness. Acting like we haven’t been freed yet, we’s free people… go.get.yours! Before someone else does…

The Summer Spell

In light of my favorite season beginning in the next coming weeks, there comes some complications that comes with it. The sun is so delightful and beautiful, however I think it messes with peoples brains in ways that scientists and doctors alike haven’t been able to cure yet. There are 2 things I would love to address that I think are major issues with my lover Summer.

1. The “I’m too cute and can wear anything” Syndrome.

This aforementioned syndrome mainly affects females during the summer season. It’s as if they have trick mirrors in their houses telling them “You look beautiful, it doesn’t matter if you don’t fit it into it. You’re hot anyway!”  *blank stare*. Ladies, we have to stick together so I’m just going to say this to help along our species. If you have 2nd thoughts about wearing something because you squeezed your size 12 ass into a size 6… do us all a favor and don’t wear it. The sun has a special way of tricking people into wearing anything. If you thought no one cares, trust me, they do! Do not pass GO, do not collect $200. Wear your size, keep those toes polished and keep those legs hydrated. Double up if you have to with Vaseline and lotion.

2. “To Be Single, or Not to be Single

*sigh*

This one is a big one.

You’ve been talking to a guy pre-season and it’s suddenly leading into summer and he starts to get weird. By weird, it can mean many things such as displaying symptoms like: Moodiness, Distantness, Douchebag-ness, etc. You know what that is right? He’s realizing the summer skirts are starting to come out and wants to keep his options open. The thing is, he might genuinly like you but summer makes you want to play the field and chase all the cuties that you see. We all know everyone comes out of hibernation at that time, and wants to show face. Everyone is suddenly in HEAT (literally). My theory is the heat begins to fry a couple brains, without folks even noticing it. One second he’s Hot and the next second he’s cold, word to Katy Perry. Believe me it’s frustrating and all, but you know what? Keep it moving! If you were able to grab one, you can most definitely grab another. He’ll realize once summer cools down that he wants to be boo’d up and when you’re suddenly unavailable because you’re washing your hair every night, he’ll get the picture 😉  

Too little, too late.

Dat…Chick…Neeks…

Good Morning,

Life is crazy sometimes, real crazy. Sometimes I feel like drowning and all I need is a lifevest. Again, I’ve successfully managed to mess up my health so dealing with that makes life that much more stressful. Well, that’s when God decides to send you a paddle to help see your way out. Yesterday, I had an amazing opportunity fall into my presence (as well as the Discombobulated Tricks). At first I thought it was too good to be true, but then upon rethinking it I realized why does it have to be too good to be true? Sometimes we get down on ourselves to the point that we discourage our own selves before anyone else can. Why is that? Is it to try to ‘protect’ our spirit before anyone else can damage it with their discouraging words? Is it to keep ourselves from getting excited only to be disappointed in the end? Lack of confidence? Hmmm, the possibilities are endless but either way….

Either way, I’m not having it.

I’m good at different things, so why don’t I act like it? Maybe, it’s because I don’t think I’m entitled to it. It’s interesting to me when I see rappers, singers, industry folk that brag about them being so amazing, when they’re really not. Do they know they’re not that great but put on this confident front to the world? Some do, I know that for a fact. Others don’t really know the truth and everyone is too afraid to tell them. There’s such a fine line between good confidence in knowing you have a little bit of talent in something and knowing to endure through it and then knowing when to give it a rest.

I digress.

Yesterday came to be from me just being me (didn’t mean to Dr.Seuss you lol). I have it, I know I do. Just have to use it a little more, because when I think about it I definitely know what to do with it *Drizzy voice*

‘Still Here’

Man, inspiration comes in the most interesting times.

Life is hard sometimes, real hard. Everyone goes through trials and tribulations and it’s up to us to try to see our way through the rubble and triumph. So you’ve been through a lot in your lifetime? A lot of us have. Let’s see going down the list right now :

  • Your hearts been broken.
  • You lost your job
  • You’re not sure what direction you want to take with your life
  • You’re low on cash flow
  • The person you wanted to marry, doesn’t want you anymore.
  • The person you’re married to, feels you’ve grown apart
  • Your partner cheated
  • You and a family member don’t exactly see eye to eye
  • The person you used to be friends with, betrayed you.

 

Etc… etc… ETC!

You know what though? You’re still here! Think about it for a second.

*I’ll wait…*

Aren’t you the least bit thankful that you’re here? Don’t get me wrong, I know that sometimes it feels like someone took the world and dropped it on your head but we’re alive.

I’m extremely humbled by the term “Still Here”. The significance of that really resonates within me, because I know people that sadly don’t have the chance to utter those 2 simple words.

Head up, Head High, Head Strong.

S-M-H

Good morning,

I wasn’t even going to address this, but now I feel compelled. Yesterday, over Twitter a certain Toronto rapper decided to publicly air out his grievances towards Drake. The general public only knows 1 side to the story right now, and that is the rapper calling Drake a snitch and that he hates him. To tell you the truth, I’m not even going to give this claim much thought because we don’t know the full story. What I do have a problem with is the word “snitching”. The whole of Toronto is talking about this situation and some are taking sides saying that “snitching isn’t cool”. Do you remember couple years ago when people were actually airbrushing t-shirts with “Stop Snitching”. The ignorance of that is pretty disgusting to me.

*rolls up sleeves*

What exactly is snitching and what classifies a snitch? I wish this BET generation would just go away and read a book (one that isn’t strictly Eric Jerome Dickey or Sister Souljah). Is there ever going to be a day where we get past this stupid ignorant mentality? I don’t give a DAMN what any of you say, if a crime happened to one of your family members and they told the police you wouldn’t call them a snitch. You know what helps people not get caught? DON’T DO A CRIME. Brilliant and groundbreaking, huh? This ‘hood’ thuglife for life mentality needs to seize. The more unfortunate part about all of that is that majority of those that preach it, do not even live it. Up out my face with that nonsense. If these people spent more time perfecting something positive or even perfecting their craft, there would be less time for the foolishness I’m hearing about. Everyone wants to be hood and get rich, why not do it in a respectable manner? You want to live the life of rappers you see on tv? Well guess what, half of the stuff they’re rapping about they don’t even do! Again, up out my face. Guns are killing my people and if you don’t care enough and want to keep your “cool” outlook that’s on you… just don’t let me hear you complaining the next time a 4 year old gets shot on the bus, or one of the friends you grew up with was an innocent bystander just waiting for her boyfriend to meet her & gets shot and sadly killed. This stuff gets me heated, so I think I’m just going to end this right here, some of you may not agree with me but as you know I don’t care- this stuff must stop! I’ve been affected by this on a personal level and if we keep this mentality up, crimes will just get increasingly worse and people will continuously get away with it. Is that the kind of world you want to raise your kids in?

Didn’t think so

When a Womans Fed Up

When is enough really enough?

How many times can you put yourself and your spirit in harm’s way for the sake of ‘love’. I put love in quotations because sometimes it’s not even real love. Sometimes it’s the idea of it, or changed love.

Folks, if someone keeps showing you time and time again through actions and words that they don’t care about you. Please listen. Why allow them to damage your heart even more than it already is. They’ve proven to you time and time again that they don’t cherish it, so in my books that means they’re not worthy. At one point in time, maybe the love was mutual and shared. Now it isn’t and deep down in your heart, you know this. Yes, it hurts and yes you love that person but is it really worth it? Years of abuse to your heart is not doing you any favors. It’s just making it worse for your mind and soul. You wouldn’t trust a 2-year-old with your iPod because you’re afraid they’ll break it, so why would you trust someone unworthy with something as sacred as your heart? Think about it.

(To my friend that’s going through this right now, yes this was inspired by you. Keep your head held high, you don’t deserve to be treated like you’re insignificant. You’re worth way more than that <3)

Basic

 

For all my people who have been rocking with me for months now, you all know I really have no patience for liars. Lying is a dirty disease and I really wish somehow it could be abolished. What’s worse than someone lying to you? Lying ABOUT you!

Why would anyone go and lie about someone else on something that didn’t concern them in the first place? You’re going and lying to a guy to what… impress him? Get cute, maybe that will impress him more. The fact that you’re so desperate to get a man that’s already spoken for by many is trifling and very basic of you. However what can I expect from someone of your nature? Wild animals only know how to be that, wild.

Fallback off my name, or I will have to expose you.

Don’t say I didn’t warn you 🙂

The Dark Side

Good morning faithfuls,

I have so many thoughts that have been swirling around in this head of mine, however sometimes I’m a little nervous to put it out there for the world to read. This topic I’ve been meaning to write about, however it’s so touchy that I end up falling back on it. The more I say I should be careful while approaching it, the more I remember my name is Aneka aka Neeks and that’s not the way that I operate. There are things that people shy away from speaking about and I believe it’s so important to have a healthy flourishing life. There’s more to talk about in life than Gucci Mane, Rihanna and partying.

I digress.

For those that watch the news, you’ll see more and more celebrities committing suicide. With each story, I hear some people say “Why would they want to do that, they have all of that money“. My response is always, money doesn’t guarantee happiness. If you’re alone when you’re poor and suddenly you get rich and you have the world at your disposal, chances are you’re even more alone. Fake smiles and fake friendships only give people a fake sense of self and decrease their confidence. If you feel alone, and I mean truly ALONE most days of your life ; chances are you’re going to spiral into a depression. The sad thing about depression is that usually friends and family realize it too late. That’s something I never understood though. If you know your friend/family member is typically a friendly/smiling type of person and suddenly they are very to themselves and always seem sad, you’re internal alarm should be ringing away. The sad part is, that’s in the easy cases. Some people walk around with a fake facade of utter bliss when inside they are feeling lower than low. I’ve said it before on this blog, that you must check up with those that you care about, because you just never know. Speaking from experience, I’ve been on both sides of the fence. Depression is such a confidence degrading experience, if you have ever been there and I mean real depression, not ” I feel depressed” because you didn’t get the pair of shoes you wanted. Knowing that a friend is depressed and has even made attempts at ending their life is very devastating. Never will I ever want ANYONE in my life to feel like they’re alone and that suicide is their only way out. You can always come to me, for help, advice or even just a hug. It’s heartbreaking to hear someone that you love think that their life is meaningless. Every life has purpose, that’s how God intended it.

From the bottom of my heart, pray about it and look to those around you to help get you through your time of need. Despite what you may think, someone out there cares. That’s real.

Time is of the Essence

They say that time is precious, but how precious is it really?

24 hours in each day and how much of that do we spend wisely?

The consensus that I get is that most of you lovely readers are over the age of 20, which means you’re all thriving adults with many things to think about in an average day. School, Work, Paying bills, Hobbies, etc etc. Our days fill up so quickly and you constantly hear the phrase “I’m so busy” or “I have no time”.

How much of that is actually true though? I mean lets just keep it 100 (as we always do) we make time for those that we want to make time for. That’s just the sad and absolute truth. The quicker we realize that, the better off we will be in life. Granted, 2 people with busy schedules it may be harder to get them together in the same spot but it’s possible. Don’t try to tell me anything different. Playing phone tag may happen but if the 2 parties are really serious and want to see each other, by golly it’ll happen. The amount of times I hear people say they’re so busy and I really have to wonder how true that is sometimes. On Twitter, people that tweet how busy they are all the time must not realize how foolish it sounds. If you’re oh so busy, you wouldn’t have time to tweet “I’m sooooo busy” every 5 minutes. Let’s just keep it real b*tch!